Early in my career at PwC, I watched my peers get promoted while I didn't. I was crushed. I had been putting my head down, doing good work, assuming it would speak for itself.
It didn't.
I wasn't advocating for myself. I wasn't asking for work that would give me visibility. I wasn't talking to people familiar with my work to understand how they actually saw my contributions. The gap between how I saw myself and how others saw me was enormous—and I had no idea.
Years later at Reforge, I got a 360 review that stung. One piece of feedback: "I have yet to see Dan make teams greater than the sum of their parts." Another: "He hasn't invested the time in really coaching others, allowing them to fail, helping them learn from their mistakes."
My mom had passed away the year before the 360. I really missed her ability to help me process the feedback without taking it personally, reflect on how I could improve, and then put it into practice.
I have gone through this myself multiple times, coached direct reports on this, and now I see it all around me in peers and teammates. Everybody needs someone in their corner, helping them get feedback, make plans to thrive, and advocate for themselves. I hope I can make my mom proud.